Saturday, October 19, 2013

Not A Fan Skit

Here is a skit we used that went along with the "Not a Fan" small group study.

Announcer: And welcome to tonight’s game!  The Loveland Tigers vs. Jesus!  Jesus won the coin toss and he is receiving.  Loveland kicks the ball . . . Jesus catches it on the 10 yard line . . . he takes it for 20 yards and is down at the 30.

Man #1:  Come on Jesus!  You can do this!

Woman #1: Jesus, Jesus he’s our man. If he can’t do it, NO ONE can!

Announcer: Jesus hikes the ball. . . fads back . . . releases a giant pass. This is one of his signature passes!  The Hail Mom!. . . he sprints to the end zone with     superhuman speed and catches the ball he has just thrown!!! Touchdown!  I have never seen anything like that!

Man#1:  Way to go Jesus!  I’m your number 1 fan!

Woman#1: Oh no you did not just say that.  I AM his number 1 fan. 

Man #1:  Oh yeah, well guess what! I own a Bible! And I have read most of it!

Woman #1: Well I have three Bibles and I am reading it through for the second time!

Man #1: Well, I go to church . . . most of the time.

Woman #1: I go to a United Methodist church every Sunday!

Man #1: So what.  I am still his biggest fan.

Announcer:  Jesus kicks the ball to Loveland and it goes all the way out to the parking             lot!  Loveland will have it at the 20 yard line.  The Tigers get into formation.  They hike the ball. . . . The quarter back is looking for an open receiver but everywhere he looks Jesus reappears right in front of the receivers! He throws the ball to #30. JESUS INTERCEPTS!  HE COULD GO ALL THE WAY. . . . the 30 . . . the 20 . . . the 10 and TOUCHDOWN!  Wow.  We are only 20 seconds into the game and it is already Jesus 14, the Loveland Tigers 0.

Woman #1:  Jesus!  Jesus! I love you!

Man #1: Oh no you don’t!  I love him more.  He knows I am his greatest fan.

Woman #1: Lord I lift your name on high, Lord I love to sing your praises!

Man #1: Stop that! This is no place for you to start singing you show off!

Announcer:  Jesus calls a time out.  He meets on the sideline with God the Father and             God the Spirit.  They speak to the referee.

Referee: Jesus calls for a substitution.  Will Frank Cunningham please report to the bench.

Man #1: Why that’s ME!  Why is Jesus calling me down to the bench?  He can’t expect             me to play for him against the whole Tiger defense!

Woman #1: Oh man.  I am glad he did not call on me.  Okay big talker.  Go show Jesus             your stuff.  You are his number 1 fan remember!

Man #1: I said I was his number one FAN!  But I don’t want to follow him out onto the field!  I only want to pay for my ticket and watch him play! 

Woman #1: When Jesus calls, you better not stalls!  Ha!

Announcer:  Loveland comes back out on the field but something seems wrong. Everyone is having a hard time just walking to their posts.  Oh, it looks like Jesus did one of his signature moves by turning their water into wine!!  Silly Jesus.  Frank Cunningham comes out onto the field for Team Jesus.  He hikes the ball, and gets sacked immediately. 

Woman #1:  Frank, Frank, he’s our man, if he can’t do it then JESUS CAN!

Announcer: Will Mary Marcowitz report to the Jesus bench.

Woman #1: What!?!  Me?!? Why me??  I can’t play.  Jesus is a thousand times better than anyone else.  Why would he want my help.  I am better at being just a fan rather than a follower.  I don’t want to follow Jesus out onto the field.

Announcer: Mary joins Frank out onto the field.  Mary hikes the ball. . . Frank takes the             ball for a run up the middle and is hit by a strong Loveland defense.

Man #2:  I paid good money to come here and see Jesus play.  Why is he putting other people in for his team.  He is already the best ever.

Man #3:  I don’t know what his deal is but I sure hope he does not ask either one of us to go down there.  I feel much safer up here in the seats.

Man #2: Tell me about it!  I am not chancing it down there!  Jesus is more than capable             of playing this game better than I could ever have.
Woman #2:  But maybe that is the point.  Maybe, just maybe, Jesus isn’t interested in us being fans more than he wants us to be followers.  Imagine what it would be like to follow Jesus out onto the field rather than just watch from the sidelines.

Man #3: It is much easier to just be a fan!  To be an actual follower takes a lot of courage and sacrifice. 

Man #2: Yeah, I am comfortable just cheering for Jesus.  There is not much more I can do to help him with his cause.

Man #3: You got that right.  Besides, what would he want with us.  What could we possibly do that could make things any better?

Woman#2: What if we all got out of the stands and followed Jesus out onto the field.  If we all played our part as a follower imagine all we could do together!

Man #3: You may have something there. I never thought of it that way.

Man #2: True, but I feel safer staying right here and cheering for Jesus!  GOOOO JESUS!     

Man #3:  Woo hoo!  Jesus rocks!

Woman #2: Here am I Jesus! Send me!

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